I’m probably preaching to the choir here (I hope..) with this post, but it’s something that’s been on my mind a lot lately…
You ever met a guy and within a few minutes of talking to him you get the feeling that something isn’t quite right there? Kinda like he’s the type of guy that spends his weekends stuffing road kill and listening to Tiny Tim on repeat?!
I certainly get messages from these kind of guys all the time and it got me thinking about writing this post; the importance of being a normal guy if you want to become better with women! 
It’s no coincidence that these kind of guys end up finding the pickup community, hoping that learning a few openers, spikes and qualifiers will negate the fact that they are a fucking weirdo and that the girl won’t notice. Unfortunately for them, women are highly perceptive creatures and see through bullshit straight away, often leaving the guy angry and frustrated that “this pickup stuff doesn’t work!”
And even if the guy somehow manages to sleep with a girl, once she does realise who he really is beneath the mask, her interest will evaporate faster than a fart in a fan factory.
You see, learning pickup, whatever style you go for, is just the acquisition of new social skills that should complement an already solid foundation i.e. you should already be a well-rounded individual or at the very least be aware of the areas of your life that need addressing and be actively working on them.
Learning pickup alone without addressing the other areas of your life reminds me of the saying “you can’t polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter.” Sure you might have perfected ten minutes of material that gets you on a date with a girl, but once she see’s past the glitter, it’s going to go downhill pretty quickly.
Part of the reason I had a lot of early successes when I started my daygame journey is due to the fact I was already a pretty normal guy. Chatting to Krauser recently, he highlighted that it seemed as though I was never “pussy repellant.”
For most normal guys that get into pickup, they end up coming to the realisation that pickup is just one facet of a much bigger package and so work on other areas of their life in tandem with learning pickup skills. You’ve probably all heard the phrase “game is a trojan horse.”
The problem for the guys I’m on about is often they’re completely oblivious to the fact that they have some gaping holes in their foundations and the fact that in the pickup community it’s more marketable to promote short-term quick fixes e.g. lines/routines than to tell a guy he has some serious long-term work to do on himself.
So for guys who are struggling to improve their success with women despite learning some game, here are some signs you’re probably a bit of a weirdo:
You struggle to maintain friendships/relationships outside of the pickup community.
You have no hobbies and interests outside of the pickup community.
You have no goals or a mission outside of the pickup community.
You spend a lot of time bitching and arguing online.
You believe you are perfect and can’t take advice.
You constantly blame others for your failures and can’t accept responsibility.
This post triggers you 😉
And if any of the above does apply to you, then really consider the message of this post and sort it out!
1. By normal I don’t mean you have to be the typical blue collar, 9-5 type guy or be like everybody else, but there are some fundamentals you do need to have. See above.
Finally sat down and got round to knocking up a bit of a montage consisting of some of the awesome stuff I got up to this year.
2017 has been a mixed bag of a year for me; I’ve been on the road for most of the year, teaching bootcamps, 1-on-1’s and residentials around the world, which I’ve loved.
I’ve also had experienced more of the struggles & difficulties that come with living this nomadic lifestyle, which I speak about a bit in this post.
All in all though it’s been a pretty epic year and I’m looking forward to 2018, which is starting off with a bang at the premiere of the documentary I filmed with Tom earlier in the year.
To everyone who’s supported me during the year, including all the students I’ve taught, guys that stop me on the street and you guys online that like, comment on and subscribe to my content, thank you and I hope you have a great New Years!
Winter is finally here in the UK, grey skies, frosty mornings and pretty girls hidden under layers of cheap Primark scarves!
It’s the time of year that guys thinking about starting daygame postpone till the spring, beginners often quit with the biting weather compounding their AA and even some experienced guys decide it’s time for a break…
Thankfully it’s not winter everywhere…no, you lucky bastards down under are approaching peak daygame conditions, which is why I’m hoping to plan a trip to Oz this December to escape the bleak UK weather and join you hunting sheilas in the sun.
I’m planning on running a couple of bootcamps and one-on-ones whilst I’m there as well as mini-residentials if any guys are up for that and also give a couple of free talks.
Most of my interest comes from Sydney though if Melbourne gets enough interest I’d be happy to go there too.
For further information and to book a slot email firstname.lastname@example.org and we can sort out a Skype call to discuss further.
It’s been a while since I’ve put out any content across my channels, aside from my Instagram account on which I’m always posting behind the scenes content from my coaching sessions. Many of you have messaged me to ask why this is, “have I quit the game?”,“am I still teaching?” and “are you still alive?” have been some of the most common questions in my inbox.
In this post I’ll aim to tell you what’s been going on…
Those of you that follow me will know the last real content I put out was from the epic World Tour I embarked on with Mr Torero. During that month of July, I spent a month on the road teaching sold out bootcamps across the globe, helped film a documentary, put out my own content and tried to explore each city. By the end of that trip I was exhausted and broken from all the late nights, early starts, copious amounts of beer and near constant jet-lag!
I needed a break.
So I decided to take a bit of time away from the scene. I spent much of August just chilling and pursuing my other hobbies. In September I had a family bereavement and October I spent a small amount of time in hospital, but it was during this period of downtime that I had a lot of time to think about things, mainly how my life had changed since coming back from Australia 18 months ago and how that’s affected me as a person.
For the most part, the last 18 months of my life has been an incredible adventure. I’ve been extremely lucky to have been able to travel the world, I’ve dated and had awesome experiences with beautiful women from all walks of life, I’ve helped countless guys change not only their dating lives but their lives in general, I’ve continued to develop a skillset that will serve me in both my personal and professional life for years to come and I wouldn’t change it for the world.
But…being a full-time pickup/dating coach is something not many people will experience in their lifetime and so whilst guys often say to me “man you’ve got the best job in the world” they would find it incredibly hard to believe me when I say it’s ‘not all gravy.’
“So what’s the issue?!”
When I first got into “the community” or “manosphere” as it’s often referred to, it was purely because I was unhappy with my dating life, I felt helpless and wanted to improve myself and take control of that area of my life. Fast forward six years and I feel like I’ve done that, I’ve got the tools to be able to meet, attract and date the women I want in my life and no longer feel afraid to be alone as I did in my early twenties. I understand the rules of the sexual marketplace and no longer go into situations with my eyes closed ‘hoping for the best.’
The first minor issue I have is the fact that these days I really can’t stand the “manosphere,” which by the very nature of what I do, I’m a part of. When I started out, the community was largely just an online gathering of guys who traded tips and advice on getting better with girls. Yes you still had trolls and keyboard jockeys who’d argue over ridiculous things but these days it’s mutated into a stream of negativity over things like Politics & Feminism, things I really don’t give a fuck about. Guys who used to support and help each other now berate, belittle and put it each other down to support their claims of being “the best pickup artist.”
By and large I ignore most of the above, including the haters, trolls and general weirdos that plague my various inboxes on a daily basis and actually there are a number of genuinely cool guys that I’ve either met or heard about who give value through the manosphere and that’s great! This is the first reason you’ve been seeing less of me online, purely because I spend less time in the manoshpere.
The second main reason I’ve taken a step back from the public eye is a more of a personal reason.
As I mentioned earlier, when I started out on this journey it was a purely selfish endeavour designed to improve an area of my life that needed vast improvement. But now it’s an even larger part of my life given the fact it’s my full-time job. Out of all the positive changes I’ve seen in myself over the years there’s one thing that I’ve started to notice which began to worry me a little and that is the fact I was doing a lot of things out of ego and not because I truly wanted to.
I started getting notches not because I liked the girl but because in the back of my mind I knew I had an audience that wanted to hear about it. I started doing crazier sets, not because it was entirely fun for me but because I knew my competition was doing it. I even started to feel guilty for liking a girl for more than just sex for fear of being labelled a ‘beta’ or some other meaningless badge by some random guy online I’ve never even met or give a shit about.
Those things probably helped my game and so I’m not saying I regret any of it, of course not, but slowly the magic of daygame and why I started doing it in the first place began to die and I started to lose the enjoyment of it. I felt myself becoming a bit weird and unbalanced. I wasn’t truly happy.
So I took some time out to figure things out and feel like I’m in a much better place now and moving in the right direction.
Firstly I’ve reconnected with why I started this in the first place. I’m less interested in satisfying the ‘notch count hyena’ and more interested in going for what I really want. This means operating on a sniper approach basis, that ensures I expend less mental and physical energy whilst still getting results. I’ve noticed this has improved my overall game and enjoyment of it.
I’ve been putting a lot more time and effort into my other passions. Being a pickup coach isn’t a long term goal and so I’ve been investing in my photography with a view to eventually transition into that full time, whenever that may be. This has helped me become more balanced and gives me something to work on during quiet periods.
I’m still coaching and I continue to enjoy it. I just got back from an awesome residential in Prague with a guy with zero experience and hearing his updates since the resi inspires me to continue helping guys that need help. I’ve shifted my focus away from all the bullshit and negativity in the manosphere and invest more effort into the guys that are serious about improving themselves.
And overall I’m spending less time online and more time in the real world, meaning less time reading weird posts/comments by weird guys and more time connecting with real people including my friends and family, whom I saw less and less of the more time I traveled and constantly chased new notches.
And so that’s where I’m currently at.
The plan going forward is to continue developing and growing myself personally, whilst continuing to coach guys around the world and to figure out a plan to put out regular content that gives value to my audience.
Lastly, cheers to everyone that’s shown me love across my various social media platforms, I appreciate the support and I’ll see you on a video very soon!
Imagine a scene from one of your favourite post-apocalyptic movies.
A group of men, starving and famished from going days without eating, stumble upon a can of out-of-date food in a building they find refuge in. The leader of the group moves quickly to take control of the food, deciding how much each person can eat and when they can eat it.
The scarcity of food and the length of time each man has had to wait before finding some causes tempers to fray and fights break out as each man tries his best to take as much food as he can. Eventually the alpha of the group defeats the others and takes the food for himself leaving the others to starve and live off scraps.
The scene ends with the alpha guarding the tin of food whilst the others look helplessly on…
Everytime I return home to the town I’m from, I see this scene play out on a weekly basis in the local pubs and clubs, except instead of food guys are fighting over (though sometimes in the kebab shop at 3am it is), it’s girls.
Guys often ask about whether game works in small towns as well as in big cities. In short, yes it does, game is game. There are a number of differences for small town game but here’s where I see the main issue arise.
In small towns and cities, there are less girls and even less attractive ones i.e. they are a scarce resource. This scarcity leads to increased competition for these girls.
In an economic climate, scarcity leads to an increase in value. In the sexual market place, in small towns and cities, a girls value is often inflated above and beyond the market norm, for example; a girl viewed as a ‘6’ in a big city is often viewed as an ‘8’ in a small town due to the fact she’s a scarce resource.
This value inflation causes a lose-lose situation in most cases.
Low value guys lose as normal (high value girls don’t sleep with low value guys).
High value guys win as normal (high value guys sleep with high value girls).
Medium value guys lose (think a guy 6) as the average girls value has been inflated so much so that they can no longer get them.
Average girls lose too due to the fact that a) the high value guys are sleeping with the high value girls and b) they aren’t sleeping with the guys they should be sleeping with due to their inflated perception of their own value.
Everytime I come back home and catch up with my friends in the local pub I see the above.
The hottest girls in the town are always in groups with the local bad boys and high value guys. The low value guys are sat in the corner getting pissed not interested in girls altogether and the guys that are approaching girls are generally getting shot down by girls two points lower than them.
The solution then is simple.
Learn tight game or;
Move to a bigger city where the playing field is a bit more equal
If you for whatever reason you can’t move then learn tight game and don’t do what the other guys are doing an paw over girls who you know deep down you wouldn’t bat an eye-lid at if she was plonked in the middle of Oxford Street in London. Become a high value guy and get the high value girls.
Now that the dust has settled and I’ve (sort of) gotten over the extreme jet-lag, fatigue and hangover of the World Tour, I’ll get back to posting on the blog, starting with a breakdown/round-up of the last 30 days.
As most of you will know, I spent the last month with Tom Torero as we taught 5 bootcamps around the world whilst filming a daygame documentary and of course trying to get a notch in each city.
Whilst it sounds like we were just on an extended holiday, it was actually one of the most intense, exhausting and physically draining trips I think I’ve ever done. Travelling from summer to winter to summer, forward into time and back in time, teaching sold out bootcamps whilst jet-lagged and hungover, filming a feature length documentary and also battling the emotional rollercoaster of chasing new lays in each city, it took everything we had just to get through it sanity in tact.
Still, the experience and stories we got from the trip are so good that I’ve decided to turn them into the backbone of my first kindle book, which I’ve started to write today. For now, here’s a brief summary of what happened on our epic adventure 😉
London was the first city of the tour.
We only had 2 nights there before jetting off to New York. The Saturday we taught the bootcamp which ended with one of the students getting a notch from a girl he approached in a shop near Covent Garden. Spirits were high and that evening I met up with some of the local daygame contingent including Ricky Roma for a few beers and some gutter game.
First set of the night I approached was a dreamy 18 year old near Leicester Square and almost immediately I bounced her to the casino we were just drinking in. Whether it was the combination of high spirits from the bootcamp, the fact it was only day one of the tour or something else, I ended up spending far too long on the date without escalating. Three hours later and two hours too late I finally made out with her but she wouldn’t come back to my hotel and went home, a perfect opportunity wasted by frankly beginner mistakes. This mistake would come to haunt me by the end of the trip but served as a good reminder that I needed to pull the trigger fast on the tour.
On the Sunday we began filming the documentary in Central London. Interviews and infields took most of the day to do and by Sunday evening I decided against going out to gutter game again knowing I had an early flight to New York in the morning.
My first few days in New York were a bit of a write off.
It was amazing to be there for the first time in my life, it all seemed so familiar due to seeing it hundreds if not thousands of times in the movies but something was off. My brush with rapid onset ONEitis and frustration at my lack of escalation in London coupled with jet-lag and the shock of the living conditions we were going to have to deal with in Harlem, resulted in a bit of a slump.
I spent the majority of my time just enjoying the sites and doing touristy things such as taking photos and visiting places I’d seen in movies and on the news. I just couldn’t get motivated to do pickup but knew I’d need to get in the groove with a 1-on-1 and bootcamp coming up.
Thursday we filmed the documentary guys, Friday I taught a 1-on-1 and by the end of the bootcamp on Saturday I’d started to get back into my stride, number closing a beautiful Russian dancer, a lazy set in Central Park and a girl in-front of the cops for the students to see that it didn’t matter.
Tom had got laid during the week and I was struggling to get my leads out before we were due to fly to LA (the trouble with only being in a city for a few days..). I knew I only had one more shot at a lay in New York so on the final night we set off for an evening of gutter game in Harlem.
The previous night we’d stopped and gone on a date with a 2-set so knew it was possible in Harlem and low and behold, the first set of the night was a Puerto Rican “yes girl.” As quickly as I’d opened, I’d bounced her to a bar where I was the only white person there and the doorman actually checked whether it was okay for me to come in. Not making the same mistake as the London girl, I escalated quickly and within an hour she was calling me “Papi” as I nailed her in our grotty Harlem apartment.
Arriving in LA was a magical experience.
The sunset out of the window of the plane was spectacular and I was looking forward to spending a week in the Californian sunshine in a nice apartment with a pool in Hollywood.
The first set of LA was a hot Turkish girl I stopped on the Tuesday and arranged a date with for the Thursday. She looked like a typical LA girl with her big sunglasses, book in one hand and Starbucks in the other. Before the date I found two venues close to our apartment and ran my standard date model. She needed one more drink in venue two before agreeing to come back, then I had to battle a bit of LMR as she was on her period but we ended up having sex, the bed looking like a crime scene after.
I was content with my LA notch so did touristy things for the rest of the week until the bootcamp on the Saturday, like hiking up Runyon Canyon and hanging around the Walk of Fame. We taught the bootcamp and filmed the documentary in beautiful Santa Monica.
During the bootcamp I demo’d on a hot Brazilian who was oozing sexuality as she walked past me. She was on her way to the beach but I could tell it was on if I could get her out that evening as we were due to fly to Sydney the next day. She took a while to reply to my ping but agreed to meet up later that evening.
I ran the exact same model as I did on the previous date and ended up with my third lay of the trip without any LMR. The next day we headed to the airport where we discovered that actually we weren’t due to fly to Sydney for another day, so that evening I got the Brazilian girl back round for another evening of fantastic sex.
Landing in Sydney is always special for me.
I lived there for almost two years and it’s where I honed my skills to become a daygame coach.
The journey from Los Angeles though was crazy. We were delayed by two hours on an already marathon fourteen hour flight. I arrived in Sydney delirious, confused and exhausted after going without sleep for close to 48 hours.
I spent the next few days pretty much in the vicinity of our apartment on Pitt St resting and fighting off the illness I could feel coming.
On Thursday I hosted a meet up with some of the local Sydney daygamers before going to meet my friend from home for a drink. Tom had bought me a swanky apartment near the bars on George St as he was having his own romantic adventures and wanted our apartment to himself for a night. I didn’t mind as the apartment he’d got me was sick and I was looking forward to a decent nights sleep.
That never really happened though. As I was in the second bar with my mates, a hot Brazilian walked past and instinctively I did the ’60 years’ opener, holding out my hand and saying ‘hello.’ She held my hand for close to five minutes and I knew it was on. We chatted at the bar for a while before my mates decided to leave. I said my goodbyes to my mates and went to meet her friend who was sitting at the other side of the bar talking to another guy.
It turned out that the girls had been approached by two guys, one of them now intently staring at me for ‘stealing his girl.’ My girl and I made out at the bar and I just killed time by building comfort with the friend before she magically eye-coded my girl to let her know it was fine to leave with me. Back at the apartment it was easy, the sleep I craved never happened, instead we spent the whole night fucking.
In the morning (after we fucked again) I went back to meet Tom as I was due to be filmed for the documentary. I felt horrendous, lack of sleep, jet-lag and continuous hangovers finally caught up to me. I managed to stumble my way through the interview but when it came to infields I was awful. My vibe was terrible and I only just scraped a number off an Ozzie doctor before I crashed out.
The final day we taught the bootcamp and it took everything I had to maintain a good vibe for the students. By the end of the bootcamp I was ready to pass out but I’d agreed to meet up with the legend Alex Coulson for a beer and then earlier in the week a girl I’d met in Cairns a few years ago asked if I wanted to meet for a drink.
After a couple of beers with Alex I felt a little less ill and met up with the English girl who’d messaged me through Facebook. I wasn’t sure whether it was just a drink to catch up or what but when she turned up in a figure hugging dress and heels I knew she was at least thinking about sleeping with me.
I took her to two of my favourite Sydney venues like old times before bouncing her back to the apartment to ‘see the view from the roof.’ Tom was ill and outside waiting in the rain, angrily messaging me to hurry up so I told her we only had twenty minutes before he came back. She replied “I wonder what we can do in twenty minutes.” The sex was fast but good and now my fifth notch in the space of a few weeks. I felt like I was on a roll.
I’d always wanted to go to Singapore and now I was here to teach a 1-on-1 and to film a guy for the documentary.
The city was hot, humid and sticky but amazing for photography. I took advantage of the fact I was there to take lots of photos knowing I could approach girls during the 1-on-1 with my student.
The day of the 1-on-1 Tom had flown to Hong Kong to close a lead and I’d got a few numbers managing to stack two dates that night. The first one was a Vietnamese girl who was quite cute. She turned up and after the first drink just stood up and left.
Slightly tipsy, tired and confused I went back to my apartment and carried on drinking. I wasn’t in the mood for the second date so threw out a Hail Mary telling her I’d get her an Uber to the apartment to drink by the pool. Surprisingly she agreed. She wasn’t the hotter of the two and I wasn’t really arsed but the lure of getting another lay in a new city made me press on and get the notch. Immediately after I got her an Uber home and sat outside the apartment drunk, smoking a cigarette whilst waiting for a McDelivery. I felt grotty but nevertheless it was six lays, one in each foreign city of the trip. One city to go…
Being back in Europe felt great.
The hotness factor is definitely recognisable when you touch down in a European city after being in the States, Asia and Australia.
That and the fact the weather was amazing, the city beautiful and the beers large, cold and refreshing immediately lifted the spirits.
We only had a couple of days there, with the first day being a write off after the long flight from Singapore. After the documentary filming on the Friday I saved my energy for teaching the bootcamp on Saturday and decided the final chance for a lay would come from an all-nighter after the bootcamp.
The bootcamp was roasting but the hotness of the girls and enthusiasm from the students made it a good one, with students going on instant dates and collecting a lot of phone numbers. I was up for the final night of gutter game, hoping to meet a hottie to finish the trip.
Tom, myself and our documentary guy Josef headed out after dinner and started prowling the main pedestrian street. Tom pretty quickly ended up stopping a dreamy librarian looking girl and headed off into the night on a date, leaving Josef and I on the street.
I hadn’t spotted anything worth approaching for a while, Josef had stopped a few girls and even said to me “you know what, I’ve not seen you approach yet..” Literally a few minutes after he’d said that the daygame gods presented me a gift in the form of a six foot tall Bosnian beauty, strolling down the street in high heels, wearing a little backpack on her toned back. Boom, “this one” I said as I ran off after her.
The stop worked a charm and the sexual tension was immediate, her beautiful smile and giggle on display as soon as I said “excuse me.” Within a few minutes I was walking her to the beer hall we’d just come from. We had one drink there before heading off to a bar closer to my apartment, stopping to make-out in-front of the beautiful Marienplatz.
In the second bar I knew it was on but was concerned with logistics as the apartment we were staying in was shit and I didn’t know where Tom was as he didn’t have data. She suggested checking out the apartment and it was only a few minutes inside before Tom turned up, pissed and yelling “twenty minutes or I’ll fuck her.”
I thought to myself “fuck this,” this girl was beautiful and a pleasure to be around, I wasn’t going to rush the lay just so Tom could get some sleep. She wanted to spend the night with me so I took the lead and suggested getting a cheap hotel, which she didn’t bat an eyelid at.
I quickly found a hotel not far from us and we left the apartment, bumping into Tom on the way who looked relieved that he could go and crash out. At the hotel the sex was amazing and we both laughed at how crazy the night had been.
In the morning we fucked again and said our goodbyes before I headed off to pack my things and go to the airport. Tom had left on an earlier flight and so I met a couple of the bootcamp students for a quick beer, recounting my night and what they’d gotten up to after the bootcamp.
Thirty days, seven lays, four new flags and a daygame documentary later, the World Tour was officially over!
A massive thank you to all the students I taught during the last month, also to the guys who turned out for the documentary filming, to Tom for the opportunity and putting up with me for a month and to all of the girls who made the trip so memorable and to you guys who read, watched and followed along – Thank You!
**Don’t forget to check out my YouTube and Instagram for more behind the scenes from the World Tour**
I’ve just woken up back in my childhood home, to be greeted by my mother singing murdering Happy Birthday and my phone beeping with social media notifications.
Yep, it’s my birthday and I just turned 31.
I thought it would be a poignant day to touch on the whole ‘does age matter’ in pickup debate, especially as back in my late teens/early twenties, I genuinely thought that if I hadn’t found “the one” and got married and had kids by the time I was thirty, then I’d be fucked. Destined to spend eternity alone, masturbating non-stop to virtual reality porn.
Oh how I was wrong.
The last twelve months I’ve spent the majority of my time travelling the world, teaching daygame and having a great deal of fun whilst doing so.
So “Age, does it matter?!”
The short answer for men is that, no it doesn’t really matter. I know seducers far older than I who are still crushing it in game and in life (think Tom & Nick, the two main guys who helped shaped my beliefs and game early on). Also anyone who’s followed Rollo Tomassi’s work will know that younger women are generally attracted to older guys.
However that’s not to say that you are exempt from putting in continuous work and effort as you age. For a more in-depth look at where age fits in to your sexual market value, check out this post.
Younger guys should focus on building their value. The main issue for younger guys is that women are attracted to power & charisma, something younger guys tend to lack due to not yet having the kind of life experiences that build these traits.
During your late teens and early twenties, you literally have licence to do whatever the fuck you want and not really have any major repercussions. Go crazy, experiment with all styles of game, travel as much as you can, experience as many new things as you can and start to form an idea of the man you want to become.
This will serve you well later on in life, and naturally you’ll become a more attractive man. Obviously don’t neglect learning game, but really when you’re that young you can get laid without it. I did and I was a chode back then.
Older guys should focus on demonstrating their value. The main issue I see in older guys is despite having built value (often massive value), they literally have no idea how to display it or if they do it’s usually in a miss-calibrated way that attracts the wrong type of women (think gold diggers).
Learning game is critical as an older guy to avoid falling into the typical traps of online dating, becoming a sugar daddy or worse a provider for a post wall woman.
Also staying disciplined with your health and nutrition becomes more important the older you get. Without your health it’s bloody hard to do anything, let alone pickup chicks! Hitting the gym, eating well and working on your fashion can also knock years off your perceived age, I often get told I look early to mid twenties, which is great!
And remember, “you’re only as old as the person you feel” 😉
I’m currently sat in Bristol Airport about to catch a flight to Barcelona to kick off my Euro Jaunt season and to teach a residential. I thought I’d write a quick post based on one of my favourite movies of all time.
‘Into the Wild,’ is the story of Christopher McCandles, an adventurer, maverick and definitely a black sheep. The film chronicles the story of his life, from being a model student to rebelling against the system and ultimately his demise.
The Sean Penn adaptation is taken from the book written by Jon Krakauer and in the book there are a number of passages, quotes that are not only inspiring, but directly relate to how you can become a better seducer.
I’ll start with one of my favourite passages from the book;
“make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty.”
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild
We all know that to become a good seducer, breaking free of your blue pill conditioning is an absolute must. When you jump into the “helter-skelter” craziness that is daygame and pickup, you initially feel awkward and strange for doing it but if you stick at it long enough you’ll see that without it you’d never live the life you truly want to.
My point is that you do not need me or anyone else around to bring this new kind of light in your life. It is simply waiting out there for you to grasp it, and all you have to do is reach for it. The only person you are fighting is yourself and your stubbornness to engage in new circumstances.”
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild
With anything in life, it all starts with and ends with you. Yes, I and other coaches in this industry can help you get to where you want to be but if YOU don’t truly want it then there’s nothing anybody else can do to help you.
“I read somewhere… how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong, but to feel strong… to measure yourself at least once.”
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild
So many people in this world go through life never truly knowing their own potential. Daygaming forces you to measure yourself constantly, every-time you go out and stand in-front of a new girl. This real world feedback is crucial if you want to develop yourself as a man and as a seducer.
“That’s what was great about him. He tried. Not many do.”
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild
The amount of times I hear guys saying, “I wish I had the guts to do what you do” is staggering. Nowadays everyone is searching for a magic pill, we’re constantly sold the idea of short-cuts to get to your goals but in reality the secret is you just have to try, i.e. TAKE ACTION!
“I now walk into the wild.”
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild
The very essence of cold approach is embracing the unknown and doing it anyway. Christopher McCandles feared the unknown, like we do when we feel ‘approach anxiety’ but he also embraced the unknown with boundless excitement and passion and that’s what fuelled him to do the crazy things he did.
There are hundreds more nuggets of gold contained within that book, I’d recommend it to anyone looking for a bit of inspiration in their lives. The movie is brilliant and the soundtrack by Eddie Vedder is also stunning!
“I now fly to Barcelona”
– Craig Cassidy, Bristol Airport 😉